Living in and out of reality as I chase my dreams sky high.

Wednesday, 30 April 2014

Chasing the Sun: A Hike in the Woods.

Ithaca has the most beautiful sunsets and I was planning on capturing that. I didn't capture the sunset, instead I somehow got carried away into the woods and just sat down and enjoyed the piece and quiet it has to offer. There is something rather odd about the woods. Its quite unclear but I find a lot of solace in the emptiness, and quietness. I feel very safe here in the shadows of the now bare trees. 

I think what I fear the most now is seeing my own shadow. I can't escape it in the open. I can't shake it off. How odd for one to want to separate oneself from ones shadow.

Tuesday, 29 April 2014

Take Back the Night!

On Friday I joined a group of people on a march from campus to downtown. It was about raising awareness for Rape, Sexual Assault, and Domestic Violence. After the march we gathered around and there were victims who spoke out. There were also performances by people; poetry and music. It was all so empowering. I was so inspired by these women and men who spoke out and shared their stories. They were all fighting for their justice, and I hope one day they all receive it. I am so glad I got to be a part of this event, and I hope that someday sexual violence is something that we only read about in History books. But there is a very long time for that. I remember when we were marching down chanting stuff, there was a boy who started humping this girl in front of us. How disgusting, how cruel. But to that girl, who allowed him to do that and was laughing, to her I feel sorry. I feel sorry you have no dignity. There were some other people who were making rude comments. But we ignored them and kept chanting! People can be so disrespectful, and to think we still live in a world where rape s considered a joke is outrageous and barbaric. What I don't understand is how someone could think its funny. I feel helpless against people like this, but I know I need to join the fight for justice, and someday justice will prevail!

Monday, 21 April 2014

Happy Days!

You can never be too old for balloons. You forget your sanity, and maybe thats the magic of childishness. Maybe thats the key to happiness. 

Friday, 18 April 2014

Shameless selfies: Appreciating one's beauty!

I was feeling very blissful, and fresh today. I finally feel like things are going great. I feel energised, and I believe this is the best I have looked in awhile. So I thought a few shameless selfies wouldn't hurt.

I am also trying this new thing where I appreciate myself a little bit, because I always bring myself down, and its not the greatest feeling. Also I read somewhere that treating yourself with respect is one of the first steps to gaining confidence, and happiness. Also appreciating ones beauty is an integral part of feeling content with oneself. So I am going to list down three things I like about my face.

  1.  I am often complimented on my hair, and I feel that it is one of my greatest beauties.
  2. Everyone tells me I have my mother's eyes, and I feel that is my mother's most defining beauty. My eyes aren't as beautiful as hers. But I supposed if someone could compare me to her beauty, they must be something.
  3. I like my dimple chin. It's not always noticeable in photos. I never thought anything of my chin, until an artists told me it was a very defining characteristic of mine. I always hated it because of the scar below it. But I guess it makes it more interesting. After all whats beauty without a few rough edges. 

Tuesday, 8 April 2014

The First Thunderstorm of the year: Learning to Battle it on my own!

At the stoke of midnight I heard thunder. Could it be the first thunderstorm of the year? It was, wasn't it? I looked outside my window as the lightning flashed. It was an incredibel sight, but at the same time a feared one. I am afraid of thunder, and lightening. The loud noise, the scattered lights, it all comes so suddenly. I always jump at the sight of lightening, or the sound of thunder. When I was a child I thought the sky was breaking, and that it was going to fall. I would run into my parents room, and sleep beside my mom because I was so scared. I look now and I have nowhere to hide, and no one to comfort me. So I hide under my covers, shut the curtains and sit confined in my space. I seek comfort but I can't find any. I sit by myself in hope that the storm will pass soon. It will wont it?

The Storm has passed, but it continues to rain. I finally come out of my covers and sit here and think for awhile. I am no longer seven, no instead I am a nineteen year old who is afraid of thunder and lightening. There is something quite comedic about it. I laught to myself at my childishness. But the truth is no matter how old I become, no matter how far away I am from home. I will always seek comfort in my mother's arms. Because only a mother's arms can shelter you from a storm. But I look around and my mother is far far away, and I realize its time to finally step into the storm and battle it, because I can't hide in my mother's arms forever. So its time then, to really grow up.

The first storm has come and passed, but its the first of many headed my way. I wasn't quite ready to face the storm, but now I am prepared for anything that comes my way.

Sunday, 6 April 2014

The last winter chills...

I take in the last chills of winter before its all gone. I've never been happier to put my winter coat away. I am ready to enjoy Spring in hopes that it lasts forever. I am in no rush for Summer, nor Fall. I've missed the Sun, and now I am very delighted to have it back. I've missed the green grass, the warm winds, the flowers, the heat, and the blazing sun. I've missed it all, and now I just hope that this is the last of the winter chills. Because the cold has been just a little too much.

An Afternoon by the lake.

The weather is starting to finally turn around in Ithaca, and its safe to say that Spring is here. Although I think I might have to hold on to my sweaters for a little bit longer. But honestly I am not complaining. One of the things I have come to appreciate living in such a cold place is the sun, so whenever the sun shows its face I take a step outside, and just soak it all in.

It feels so uplifitng with such great weather. It makes me want to walk around aimlessly, fly a kite, or just laze around in the sun all day. The sun has finally come to stay, and I can't be happier in welcoming it. 

Tuesday, 1 April 2014

21 things I love

  1.  I love listening to love stories. I could spend hours watching marriage proposals, and reading the commitment sectionI think they are absolutely beautiful. I believe in true love, and that somewhere along the road I am going to fall into the arms of my prince. That too in a very dramatic Bollywood style. I also believe that he will bring me yellow roses not red.
  2. I love eating ice-cream, that too right out of the container itself. My favorite is Haagen Daz Belgian Chocolate Ice-Cream.
  3. I love listening to old hindi songs there is something very calming about them. Something very sincere about them. A sincerity which I find lacking in my life. 
  4. I love dancing in the rain. There is a certain childishness in that which brings me so much pleasure. 
  5. I love swinging, it makes me feel as if though I am flying in the air. I feel very free.
  6. I love flying kites. It's the greatest high. I don't know why people do drugs when they could fly kites. I believe there isn't a better natural high than that. There is a certain unexplainable thrill.
  7. I love balloons, they make me so happy. Reminding me of happy days like birthdays. 
  8. I love sunflowers, they are my favorite flowers because they remind me of open fields, hot sun, and warm breezes. I also like how they are yellow, and just so darn beautiful. 
  9. I love the ocean. It reminds me of my childhood. There is something so unknown about the ocean yet so known. It is my serenity, my salvage, and my purity. It's the freedom, and home. Everything from the salty smells, to the cool breezes, and the rocky waves. I love it all.
  10. I love mermaids. My favorite disney princess is Ariel, and as a kid I wanted to be her. I wanted red hair, sunbathe on giant rocks, swim in the giant ocean, discover thingmabobs, and meet a prince. 
  11. I love midnight swims. It helps me cool off from the days stress.
  12. I love eating mangoes, but not just any mangoes. I love the ones that are native to my town. The Alphonso mangoes. They are known as the king of all mangoes back home, and they certainly are. They remind me of warm summers, and lazy days.
  13. I love scooters. It reminds me of my maternal grandfather. The cool nights in Nerul when my grandfather would take me on rides. It was one of my favorite things when I was young, and I hope someday to live in a town where I can drive a vespa around.
  14. I love gardening. The idea to be able to grow something, and nurture it sounds so empowering. It also reminds me of my grandmother's garden in which I would help her water her plants, and pull out vegetables. I envision a garden of my own someday in which I see my children playing in.
  15. I love old books with leather covers. It's no longer about the story. But about the smell, the speckles of dust, and the stained brown paper, all the while the sophistication of the leather cover.
  16. I love star gazing, I think of those nights on the ship when I would sit on the deck and watch the stars at night. It looked as if a thousand diamonds were sparkling up above. I want summer night, lying on the grass, and an open sky full of stars. 
  17. I love fire crackers, they remind of everything celebratory. It's a reminder to just celebrate life. 
  18. I love bonfires on the beach. They remind me of summer fun, mischief, and childhood romance. 
  19. I love the color purple. It represents royalty, but to me it represents safety. It's got the mix of a dangerous red, yet depths of an innocent blue.
  20. I love taking photos, because I can capture moments and safeguard memories.
  21. Lastly I love old houses. Everything from the cracks to the vines growing on the sides to the chipped paint. I love the idea that something survived for a long time, and the idea that a home always exists for one to come home to. 
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